ps:sorry ratnah,i'll update the photos tomorrow.this damn blogger is crazy.
for whatever reasons it is about just now's incident,to be frank, i will keep in mind and never forget this day.This is the day that i felt the most extreme anger,an anger i could not control.And i don't want to say who,cause i know that person know who I'm referring to,i don want to put your name here.And now,my day is spoiled,from a good beginning, to you know what.
i don wish to fight,but whatever it is,I'm feeling it now,i feel betrayed,but somehow you said you are the one feeling that.okay,since you felt that,then that's your point of view.if you have trusted me enough,this won't happen,and you said you know everything,but you see there's something i wanted to say,but i know if i do the whole thing would be a mess,and you don believe me that i said it all.so first,the trust is gone.I know you have other bunch of problems,that you stress about,but what about me? i didn't show to you that i am stress,because i know you wouldn't want to hear it anyway because you have your own problem to handle.i hold back as much problem to myself and keep it to me only.
you said i didn't appreciate what you've done to me,but let me ask you some,if you are sincere,you wouldn't tell in your blog that you helped me,its whats from the heart,and you make that count on the problem you have.i appreciate very much what you've done or whatever.But i don care if you say i don't,because,what else must i do to make you convinced? must i really show it all off?and yes, i thought you are different,that's why i make you my best friend,i have never treated anyone as close as you,and you said you know me well,but what about this? if you know me inside out,you wouldn't have believed that.
just reflect on one thing girl,if i really hate about your relationship,i would have said to you to break up already on that day went you ask me my opinion when you have almost make up your mind to commit.remember? when you have problem with him and almost committed?well,if you don't remember,than that's your problem.at least i know it happen before.And for some reasons,i can't accept the part when you told me how much you hate that girl,and now,you sight her and said to ratnah"tapi yang selalu kutok is kao aper".you see,i know this would happen because i can feel that you seems to take a step back when it comes to those topic.And you said" kalao kao rapat ngan dier,dier dh berubah",so,willing to say you are already close to her before this.right?
And how much i tried to act normal this morning to you even though i read your blog the day before,you still avoid me,so who's avoiding who.and you said, "kalau nak sound,soundlah ,kalau nak marah,marah lah"but just now seems to be a whole lot of different thing,Zul wanted to talk to you,and then he said no need because you wanted to go home early.And then you ask we to be fast,and you came over.And from then on,i know i could never take you back,because you seems to have it all out.and for info,wrdl is loosing up,and all thanks to whatever problems we have.and raatt's closing down wrdl blog's sooner.since we don see the need of it anyway.
once more i say again, i thought you are different,but you are just the same,like other typical girls.and now its a lesson for me to learn to wisely picked someone and think again of what i've decided to be part of my life.we can be friends, but not as close as last time,what we used to be,once the glass is broke,it'll be broken and never be fixed,meaning, we can get close as much as possible and almost like we used to be,but never like last time,its all about trust.And yes, i've been making myself not to do this,to post this, but somehow you should know what i'm feeling,that's the same thing as what you wanted me to know how you feel.you can treat me whatever you want to treat me as,its your choice,I'm not getting to that.
i hate long post,because readers would be Boring now.AND i bet they are.
with regards,
